I was up late last night unable to sleep….I’ve always been “night
owl” as God brought back to me in the midst of my complaints last night (well
early this morning rather). So I resolved to just relax and enjoy the alone time,
watch a few shows hopefully until I dozed off. I happened to turn on the show “Intervention”
and watched about three episodes last night before I was finally able to sleep and
as I was watching God began to speak to me.
Addiction, in all forms, are a form of bondage. People can
be addicted to food, drugs, sex, people, etc – you name it, you can get
addicted to it if you are not careful. The common factor in the majority (not
all) of addictions are the childhood. If you see an addict, trust there is a
story there of pain, abandonment, abuse, bullying, hurt…and most importantly –
a feeling of being unloved.
I watched these individuals last night, recognizing the
demons that attack them and feeling so sad as they told their stories…. In every
single account the childhood was the starting point, the current addiction was
just the coping method.
I saw a movie that said “Childhood is what you spend your
entire life trying to overcome” (Hope Floats, 1998) and as I watched this show
I never found anything (except God) to be truer. Each of these addicts talked
about the pain they had as a child…everyone said the same thing “they were
great children…something happened with mommy and daddy…and then they felt
unloved, unaccepted, and turned to drugs to cope. The saddest thing was the family’s
inability to help the individual heal because for them to heal would mean the
family would have to take accountability for their own actions.
God warns us against certain actions in our life not to
restrict us but because we really don’t understand or take the time to realize
how easily our consequences can affect others and ourselves. We don’t see the full scale fallout from sin…and
we can’t see the internal damage and hurtful seeds it plants in those around
us. A mother/father skips out on a family, leaving children feeling
unwanted/unloved/worthless, a child is sexually abused but blamed and even
shunned, more feelings of worthlessness, a broken home without boundaries,
bullying, emotional and physical abuse, parents working to much loving to little…all
these things create wounds that we cannot see and therefore, don’t know how to
heal. Or in some cases, don’t care to.
All these things, every one of our actions…affects others –
especially the sin in our lives. One action can change an entire life for the
positive or the negatives. I believe this to be the reason God requires us to
live and act in love towards all people because doing the opposite develops
hurt and pain that translates into all type of demons that can take decades to
heal. John 13:34-35 "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have
loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my
disciples, if you love one another." We see them in our own lives as we
try to overcome the things that happened to us as children…and if we aren’t
under God’s authority, we will more than likely pass those things onto our
children as well.
I watched these children on “Intervention” each of them with
the same sad eyes, lost children trying to overcome and numb the pain.
Convincing themselves they are happy but understanding this not to be true every
time the drugs wear off and they have to deal with reality. I’ve lived that
life where you are in so much pain it’s better to simply medicate and live in a
haze than to confront the issues and cope. But the former life is not the
better life. The addiction is only a temporary band aid – a cheap one to be
exact- that often falls off and has to be reapplied with more and more adhesive
each time until finally the wound is too big to be contained by it. This is why
there is such anger and depression when you come down from your high (be it
drugs, sex, money, risk taking – whatever the addiction) and you can’t seem to
find any joy.
We have to become more accountable for our actions – not only
toward ourselves – but especially to those around us. Because God will hold us
accountable for the harm we’ve done to others and whatever came of that harm
during judgment. This goes for parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins,
grandparents, family friends, etc. – we will all be accountable for any actions
we did that caused another to stumble and fall away from God. “But if anyone
causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better
for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the
depths of the sea.” Matthew 18:6
Remember, in all you do, in all you have done…. “Do
everything in love.” 1 Corinthians 16:14 this is our greatest commandment…and
love surely does heal all wounds.
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